Happy Birthday was what Frosty the snowman always said in those clay-mation / animated programs I barely remember from my youth whenever his silk hat was placed on his head. So here we are, ten pm on the only night this week I'll have to do my college homework. Sounds like a great time to start blogging. Happy birthday.
So here we go. I'm a 37 year old American man and I am the very embodiment of some of the best and worst things you've come to expect of the internet. I'm all gut no butt, a HUGE computer nerd, a RPG addict, a weeaboo and a denizen of my parents basement. On the other hand I'm a student in two different schools simultaneously, a laborer at a saw mill, and the guy everyone I know comes to for advice (sometimes to their peril). Even my ex-wife.
What the hell is a weeaboo. Well there's this horrible website called 4chan. Believe me, this is not for everyone, in fact, this website is for absolutely nobody. However, as it is sometimes said on 4chan. None of us is as cruel as all of us. That is essentially 4chan. It is the worst of the internet condensed for flavor with politeness and accountability boiled away. The term weeaboo comes from this little online sugar hole on 4chan called /b/ . This is all you need to know to find out what a weeaboo is. Why I am one is anyone's guess but being married to a half asian woman probably plays some role. When we meet up we still spend most of our time together talking about Japanese bands or anime. I have like 8,000 mp3s and most of it is in a language I don't understand. Ironically I like the Korean stuff more than her. The rest of the time we screw.
I know. Don't start with me. Getting divorced and causing both parties to lose their ASS in the resulting expenses hardly seems like the sensible option for two people that still get along by and large but look. Nearly everyone within our age range who is still single is still single for a pretty damn good reason. We're not exactly prize picks either. I mean hell, I have a pic right here of me and my nine months pregnant sister chilling on the couch, posing with our shirts pulled up over our guts so mom can snap a shot of it for posterity. She's got me beat but I'm giving her a run for the money. I guess the essence of my point is my ex and I should maybe not be spending money on hotels so we have the cash to try to find someone we can love for life, but we're kinda freaking busy now and at least we can accept each others brand of batshit crazy in the meantime.
So in the meantime, I'm taking a nurse assistant course so I can work at a hospital that will give me tuition reimbursement to continue going to community college to become an RN provided I contract with the hospital to work for the hospital for like five years. I mean, why not? Its not like I have kids or a wife...or an apartment of my own. Or a shred of dignity left. I kid. I have a shred left. I'm hoping to hang onto that when I try to quit smoking sometime between now and before my RN clinicals start. Yes, I do that. In fact, I'm going to do that now.
That took awhile. See, it's not just me and the folks here at chez sea bass. We also have my niece in residence. The product of my younger brother falling in love with his first piece who just so happened to be one of the most horrifying train wrecks of humanity you never wanted to meet. He's on the other coast now merrily cheating on his wife, not returning my parents phone calls and making his wife and their child together miserable. So we all had a little pow wow about the futility of worrying about that and some words of encouragement for me. Basically comprising of, don't worry about him, keep your grades up and someday you can take care of us all. Why not? It's not like I have anything else to do.
So much to say, so little reason to say any of it at the moment. Happy birthday. I think I'll go game some and save my homework as an excuse to get out of anything unpleasant tomorrow surrounding Easter.
